Hello fellow bloggers. I know I have been bad at keeping up-to-date with this blog but I am a student. I have crazy parties to go to, hangover cures to research and friends to hang out with. Ok. I have Facebook stalking to do and Youtube videos on 'how to bake Christmas cookies' to watch. Hey, don't judge me.
So basically, I have been busy finishing off the last few dribbles of coursework that always seem like such a pain. I mean, you work hard (not really) all term and then suddenly BOOM! that little piece of work you'd forgotten about. The one you thought you could leave to the last minute. The one that was hidden under dirty dishes and scraps of paper with shopping lists written on them on your desk? Yeah. That one. Well, it's due.
So, if like me you're desperate to get on with festive fun, here are some tips on how to get those pesky essays done on time:
1) GET IT DONE AS SOON AS YOU'RE GIVEN IT. I know caps lock is annoying but I really can't emphasise that point enough. After 3 years at uni of perfecting my procrastination skills, I know what I'm talking about. I was once up until 4am finishing of an essay due in that day. By the time I'd written it I was sick with tiredness so spell-checking and proof-reading were off the table. I just handed it in. You really don't want to be in this position. Trust me. It's awful.
2) Don't be afraid to cut off all social contact. Remember the nights when you were free to do whatever you want? Well they're dead now until your essay is done. Lock yourself away in your room with a stash of food and drink if necessary. Don't talk or even look at anyone. This might encourage them to talk to you. And that is the last thing you want. Your friends may say "you've changed", that "you're not fun anymore" but guess what? They're not in uni. What do they know? You're the smart one. Spending thousands of pounds on an education to get a piece of paper that says you did something with your life for 4 years. While they're off making money and having fun life experiences you're studying. You're the smart one. Yeah.
3) This is a bit contradictory to the last point but if you're stuck ask your course mates. Teamwork can never be frowned upon. Just make sure you're not copying each other. Plagiarism isn't highly ranked by University peeps.
4) Get the music on! There's nothing wrong with listening to some of your favourite songs to get you moving with writing. And if you feel the need to dance in front of your mirror occasionally to get the blood flowing to your brain;there's no shame. Dancing and singing is proven to have improved brain activity....I'm sure.
5) Babble. They say not to but you can. Waffle and talk nonsense. You have to fill up the word count somehow.
6) Once it's done, eat chocolate and block the whole sordid affair from your mind.
And remember Christmas is but once a year. Enjoy it and don't worry so much about work. Until you get your results. Then cry and eat chocolate.
Jeni
Sunday 22 December 2013
Friday 29 November 2013
Ho, ho, what the hell will I buy you??!!
I love Christmas....I mean LOVE it! As corny as it sounds, there really is something magical about Christmas time. It's like a feeling in the air or something. All the shops are filled with beautiful decorations, it's appropriate to wear big, baggy clothes and above all on the 25th of December no one can judge you for eating like a fire is about to wipe out all food on the planet.
Now normally I don't really struggle with presents. I can normally decide fairly quickly what I'm going to get someone. But this year I'm really struggling. I mean STRUGGLING. So, let's start with my brother. Mr. "I don't want anything" is ringing his usual bell this year and not letting anything slip that could potentially lead to him actually getting a gift that he wants. On the outside I say "well, it's his own fault because he always says he wants nothing so he'll get what he's given." But on the inside I'm crumbling. What do you get for someone like that? I've got a couple of things already, but they're more novelty gifts than anything else. In theory, I shouldn't worry about getting the perfect gifts for someone who really doesn't care but the Christmas elf in me wants to see him genuinely enjoy a present I give him.
My mum is slightly easier. She's told me what she wants but it doesn't seem enough. She always says that because I'm her daughter (and a student) I don't need to buy her a lot. But it would still be nice to get her something really great. I do have back-up options because I have also bought her things for her birthday which is around the same time. I could just buy something cheap and then hand it over with something that was originally planned for her birthday. But Christmas is special and the present that is picked out should be specifically picked out for Christmas. I know, try to play catch-up with my brain on that one.
My dad is particularly hard to buy for this year. Last year I had it all figured out but this time around I am utterly confused. Of course I'm in constant contact with my mum about what to get him. I'm trying to scout out what she's thinking and maybe steal the idea. But then I'll feel bad that it wasn't MY original idea for MY dad. Ahhh!!!! I don't know why I'm stressing so much this year. For some reason I feel it's extremely important to get my family nice gifts. Maybe it's because I'm maturing and I've realised how lucky I am to have them.
And I can show them how grateful I am by putting my £100 amazon gift voucher to good use and buying everything online! Which is a real bonus for me because the crowds and the screaming children in the shops are too much for me. I love being out and about at Christmas because of the atmosphere but the crowds??? Really?? I can't...and I suspect most people are the same.
But as usual, I'm probably over-thinking everything. I mean it's the thought that counts don't they say? And besides, maybe the REAL gift to my family will be the fact that I put so much effort and stress into trying to get the perfect presents for them. I mean that shows how much I care about them. That's what Christmas is really about....that is the real gift.
YEAH RIIIIGHT!!! Bring on the new year when I'm showering myself in expensive perfume and I've gone up a dress size. What? My mum makes the best roast potatoes...
Jeni
Now normally I don't really struggle with presents. I can normally decide fairly quickly what I'm going to get someone. But this year I'm really struggling. I mean STRUGGLING. So, let's start with my brother. Mr. "I don't want anything" is ringing his usual bell this year and not letting anything slip that could potentially lead to him actually getting a gift that he wants. On the outside I say "well, it's his own fault because he always says he wants nothing so he'll get what he's given." But on the inside I'm crumbling. What do you get for someone like that? I've got a couple of things already, but they're more novelty gifts than anything else. In theory, I shouldn't worry about getting the perfect gifts for someone who really doesn't care but the Christmas elf in me wants to see him genuinely enjoy a present I give him.
My mum is slightly easier. She's told me what she wants but it doesn't seem enough. She always says that because I'm her daughter (and a student) I don't need to buy her a lot. But it would still be nice to get her something really great. I do have back-up options because I have also bought her things for her birthday which is around the same time. I could just buy something cheap and then hand it over with something that was originally planned for her birthday. But Christmas is special and the present that is picked out should be specifically picked out for Christmas. I know, try to play catch-up with my brain on that one.
My dad is particularly hard to buy for this year. Last year I had it all figured out but this time around I am utterly confused. Of course I'm in constant contact with my mum about what to get him. I'm trying to scout out what she's thinking and maybe steal the idea. But then I'll feel bad that it wasn't MY original idea for MY dad. Ahhh!!!! I don't know why I'm stressing so much this year. For some reason I feel it's extremely important to get my family nice gifts. Maybe it's because I'm maturing and I've realised how lucky I am to have them.
And I can show them how grateful I am by putting my £100 amazon gift voucher to good use and buying everything online! Which is a real bonus for me because the crowds and the screaming children in the shops are too much for me. I love being out and about at Christmas because of the atmosphere but the crowds??? Really?? I can't...and I suspect most people are the same.
But as usual, I'm probably over-thinking everything. I mean it's the thought that counts don't they say? And besides, maybe the REAL gift to my family will be the fact that I put so much effort and stress into trying to get the perfect presents for them. I mean that shows how much I care about them. That's what Christmas is really about....that is the real gift.
YEAH RIIIIGHT!!! Bring on the new year when I'm showering myself in expensive perfume and I've gone up a dress size. What? My mum makes the best roast potatoes...
Jeni
Thursday 7 November 2013
What's wrong with wanting it all?
As a young woman (shivers at thought of being a woman and not a girl) I have lots of opinions. One of them is that I consider myself a feminist. I just really believe in equal rights and opportunities for women, not to mention I have a strong dislike of men, (I'm kidding! That was joke to test you. If you were offended...you failed). I am a feminist and not in the bad, man-hating sense that some people think it is. Are you kidding me? Men are GREAT. SERIOUSLY. We love you men. I remember when I first told someone I was a feminist and they looked at me like I was diseased. I felt ashamed, like it was the worst description you could give yourself.
As much as I love being a woman and I firmly believe that women should be treated equally, I love having doors held open for me, chairs pulled out before I sit down and if you hold my coat for me while I put it on, that would be amazing! Which fyi I totally would do all these things for men as well because, hey, gender equality.
This is where I'm torn. I know I can do these things by myself. But does accepting help from a man make me less of a feminist? Is it wrong to want to be treated the same as a man when it comes to career, love and sex but then want a man to carry my bag if it's heavy?
And that brings me onto a whole other point. Some people feel that singers like Miley and Rihanna who are guilty of flashing skin and singing provocative lyrics (think this little gem: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KdS6HFQ_LUc&oref=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DKdS6HFQ_LUc&has_verified=1) are being feminists because of the fact that they do what they want, they wear what they want and they sing about what they want. While others think they are disgraceful and shameful. To me, feminism is about women being able to do what they want as long as it doesn't infringe on anyone else's rights. So if they want to be openly sexual then what it wrong with that? Many male singers are openly sexual beings too!
Singers like Ke$ha who have sung about sex a lot (another gem: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3taEuL4EHAg) are branded sluts and whores, while male rappers for example are praised for being "women magnets" and being able to stick their privates in a woman. (Apologies for crude imagery).http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y34jC4I1m70 It lacks poetry somehow, don't you think?
So what if a woman sings what a man does? Does that make it less sexist? Or is it even more sexist because it's someone degrading her own gender? But then it's not degrading at all because it's people singing about what they want to?? Feminism is such a dividing and confusing issue! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atHekn9KE18
What about marrying rich? If you want to marry a man because of his wealth so you can be looked after, does that make you less of a feminist. If you depend on a man for your money does that give people the right to treat you differently? To say you can't be a feminist or support women's rights: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQ7wT4CUprQ
What about pornography? Does it degrade a women's character for her to make her living that way or does it make her a strong independent woman, who is confident with her sexuality? I mean, does it matter how a woman makes her money? If she's making her own money, regardless of her job, should that be all that matters? The fact that she only depends on her. God, I really want to link to Destiny's child 'Independent Women' right now but I'll resist the urge as the links on this post already are starting to pile up.
The bottom line is when did wanting it all become such a bad thing? I'm not saying that it's possible but when did it become a bad thing to dream. And I'm not just talking about women who rely on their husbands/boyfriends for money. Even if you're a woman who's out there working everyday, earning money and supporting yourself because that's what you want to do shouldn't you still be able to have a man hold a door open for you or walk on the outside of the pavement. So basically, I ask what's wrong with wanting to be with a man who respects you, treats you equally but is also chivalrous? And women should treat their men with respect as well. I would always hold a door open for a a man and help men with things as much as I could.
I'm not saying women should get preferential treatment because of their gender. I'm just saying we should all be equal. YAY! A novel concept! Not everyone will always agree with feminism and not everyone is going to agree with it. We have a bad rep. Like many social, political and religious groups a few bad eggs seem to represent the lot. Just as not all Christians are against gay marriage, not all feminists hate men.
Whether you label yourself or not, please support equality and spread kindness wherever you go.
Now enough of this sap! See you on the next post...
As much as I love being a woman and I firmly believe that women should be treated equally, I love having doors held open for me, chairs pulled out before I sit down and if you hold my coat for me while I put it on, that would be amazing! Which fyi I totally would do all these things for men as well because, hey, gender equality.
This is where I'm torn. I know I can do these things by myself. But does accepting help from a man make me less of a feminist? Is it wrong to want to be treated the same as a man when it comes to career, love and sex but then want a man to carry my bag if it's heavy?
And that brings me onto a whole other point. Some people feel that singers like Miley and Rihanna who are guilty of flashing skin and singing provocative lyrics (think this little gem: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KdS6HFQ_LUc&oref=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DKdS6HFQ_LUc&has_verified=1) are being feminists because of the fact that they do what they want, they wear what they want and they sing about what they want. While others think they are disgraceful and shameful. To me, feminism is about women being able to do what they want as long as it doesn't infringe on anyone else's rights. So if they want to be openly sexual then what it wrong with that? Many male singers are openly sexual beings too!
Singers like Ke$ha who have sung about sex a lot (another gem: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3taEuL4EHAg) are branded sluts and whores, while male rappers for example are praised for being "women magnets" and being able to stick their privates in a woman. (Apologies for crude imagery).http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y34jC4I1m70 It lacks poetry somehow, don't you think?
So what if a woman sings what a man does? Does that make it less sexist? Or is it even more sexist because it's someone degrading her own gender? But then it's not degrading at all because it's people singing about what they want to?? Feminism is such a dividing and confusing issue! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atHekn9KE18
What about marrying rich? If you want to marry a man because of his wealth so you can be looked after, does that make you less of a feminist. If you depend on a man for your money does that give people the right to treat you differently? To say you can't be a feminist or support women's rights: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQ7wT4CUprQ
What about pornography? Does it degrade a women's character for her to make her living that way or does it make her a strong independent woman, who is confident with her sexuality? I mean, does it matter how a woman makes her money? If she's making her own money, regardless of her job, should that be all that matters? The fact that she only depends on her. God, I really want to link to Destiny's child 'Independent Women' right now but I'll resist the urge as the links on this post already are starting to pile up.
The bottom line is when did wanting it all become such a bad thing? I'm not saying that it's possible but when did it become a bad thing to dream. And I'm not just talking about women who rely on their husbands/boyfriends for money. Even if you're a woman who's out there working everyday, earning money and supporting yourself because that's what you want to do shouldn't you still be able to have a man hold a door open for you or walk on the outside of the pavement. So basically, I ask what's wrong with wanting to be with a man who respects you, treats you equally but is also chivalrous? And women should treat their men with respect as well. I would always hold a door open for a a man and help men with things as much as I could.
I'm not saying women should get preferential treatment because of their gender. I'm just saying we should all be equal. YAY! A novel concept! Not everyone will always agree with feminism and not everyone is going to agree with it. We have a bad rep. Like many social, political and religious groups a few bad eggs seem to represent the lot. Just as not all Christians are against gay marriage, not all feminists hate men.
Whether you label yourself or not, please support equality and spread kindness wherever you go.
Now enough of this sap! See you on the next post...
Friday 25 October 2013
Life: The ongoing competition
So the other day my flatties (refer to my last post if you don't know what I mean) and I were discussing school memories. We got onto talking about P.E, specifically swimming. Now, I only had to go swimming when I was in primary school and that was a good 10 years ago. But the horrible memories have stayed with me as if it was yesterday. On our first time there our class had to be divided into 3 groups. Squares, circles and triangles. Squares were the strongest swimmers, circles were the average swimmers and triangles were pretty awful. Guess which one I got put in?
Now, I haven't been swimming in a few years but I know I should have been placed higher than a triangle. The reason being, the group placements were based on swim races. So basically the fastest person got put into the top group and the slowest got put in the bottom one. Just because I came last in a stupid race I was forever a stupid triangle. By the way, in case you can't tell I'm still bitter about this. Anyway, after this conversation it made me realize that so much of life is a competition. I know I made a leap there.
P.E.in school was always supposed to be fun. But for people like me who aren't naturally athletic and sporty (ok, lazy) it was torture. EVERYTHING in our gym classes were competitive. Who can run the fastest? Who can do the most sit-ups in circuit training? Who can survive until the end in dodge ball. Note: I always pretended I'd been put out so I could sit out. Even social dancing was horrific. The fear of being picked last by a boy and in other words being told you were unattractive, unappealing and might as well start collecting mouse toys for when you become a lonely cat lady. I only got picked second last-YAY!
And it doesn't stop in school. University is a constant competition. Whose work is best? Who gets top marks? Who is the hot girl/guy of the class? Everything is aimed at us having to be scrutinized, evaluated and compared against others. I'm still at the uni stage but I know it continues. Workplace competition would be significantly worse I can imagine. First, the fighting for the job, then trying to show you're worthy of the position, then trying to work out who wants to be your friend and who is after your job and trying to make you look bad to oust you from the business.
With the people you're closest to? That can be even more horrific in terms of competition. Everyone's going to have a friend who's more popular, more successful, better looking, smarter, funnier and just seems to have their life more together. There's the fine line between wanting your friends to be happy but not happier than you. Don't deny it, we all know it's true. As much as you love the fact that your friend was so happy in her relationship and completely loved up, you can't deny the the smile of satisfaction that spreads across your face when you find out they're single again. Now, they have more time for you and know what it's like when something fails. Ok, maybe that's a little harsh but you know what I mean. If a friend gets a great new job you're happy for them. But only if you've just met a tall, dark, handsome millionaire who wants to take you to his Caribbean Island on a private jet and make you financially secure for the rest of your life. Or something like that.
Even relationships can be like this. Who is considered to be punching above their weight? Who is the one bringing home the most money? Who gets the most attention when enjoying separate nights out with friends? EVERYTHING is a competition. And it kind of sucks. Sometimes you just want to curl up in bed with a massive stockpile of chocolate and admit that you just don't care anymore. But instead you doll yourself up, put a smile on your face and write up a big Facebook status about something great in your life. It may not compare to Shannon travelling the world, Kelly getting engaged or Chloe getting a promotion at work but if it makes you happy, then shouldn't that be enough?
See this lady for more: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfW8deSlsiA
So, now you can understand why I called this blog post what I did. Life is an ongoing competition. And whether you win or lose at some of those challenges all you can do is laugh. Or eat chocolate. Chocolate is good too.
Jeni
Now, I haven't been swimming in a few years but I know I should have been placed higher than a triangle. The reason being, the group placements were based on swim races. So basically the fastest person got put into the top group and the slowest got put in the bottom one. Just because I came last in a stupid race I was forever a stupid triangle. By the way, in case you can't tell I'm still bitter about this. Anyway, after this conversation it made me realize that so much of life is a competition. I know I made a leap there.
P.E.in school was always supposed to be fun. But for people like me who aren't naturally athletic and sporty (ok, lazy) it was torture. EVERYTHING in our gym classes were competitive. Who can run the fastest? Who can do the most sit-ups in circuit training? Who can survive until the end in dodge ball. Note: I always pretended I'd been put out so I could sit out. Even social dancing was horrific. The fear of being picked last by a boy and in other words being told you were unattractive, unappealing and might as well start collecting mouse toys for when you become a lonely cat lady. I only got picked second last-YAY!
And it doesn't stop in school. University is a constant competition. Whose work is best? Who gets top marks? Who is the hot girl/guy of the class? Everything is aimed at us having to be scrutinized, evaluated and compared against others. I'm still at the uni stage but I know it continues. Workplace competition would be significantly worse I can imagine. First, the fighting for the job, then trying to show you're worthy of the position, then trying to work out who wants to be your friend and who is after your job and trying to make you look bad to oust you from the business.
With the people you're closest to? That can be even more horrific in terms of competition. Everyone's going to have a friend who's more popular, more successful, better looking, smarter, funnier and just seems to have their life more together. There's the fine line between wanting your friends to be happy but not happier than you. Don't deny it, we all know it's true. As much as you love the fact that your friend was so happy in her relationship and completely loved up, you can't deny the the smile of satisfaction that spreads across your face when you find out they're single again. Now, they have more time for you and know what it's like when something fails. Ok, maybe that's a little harsh but you know what I mean. If a friend gets a great new job you're happy for them. But only if you've just met a tall, dark, handsome millionaire who wants to take you to his Caribbean Island on a private jet and make you financially secure for the rest of your life. Or something like that.
Even relationships can be like this. Who is considered to be punching above their weight? Who is the one bringing home the most money? Who gets the most attention when enjoying separate nights out with friends? EVERYTHING is a competition. And it kind of sucks. Sometimes you just want to curl up in bed with a massive stockpile of chocolate and admit that you just don't care anymore. But instead you doll yourself up, put a smile on your face and write up a big Facebook status about something great in your life. It may not compare to Shannon travelling the world, Kelly getting engaged or Chloe getting a promotion at work but if it makes you happy, then shouldn't that be enough?
See this lady for more: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfW8deSlsiA
So, now you can understand why I called this blog post what I did. Life is an ongoing competition. And whether you win or lose at some of those challenges all you can do is laugh. Or eat chocolate. Chocolate is good too.
Jeni
Thursday 3 October 2013
Is Halloween sexist?
The title of this entry may seem ridiculous. Halloween is just a time of year when people get dressed up and eat as many sugary treats (or drink alcohol if you're older) as possible. How can it be sexist? Well before you roll your eyes, cluck your tongues and accuse me of being a bra-burning feminist just hang on.
Jeni
As a university student my flatmates and I have decided to throw a Halloween party. Probably nothing too crazy. We'll decorate the flat, have a few friends round and maybe play 'Just Dance' (one of my flatmates is obsessed with it). Trying to decide what to wear has become a monumental chore in our household. We've all been stressed talking to each other about what we will go as. Sleep has been lost over the issue. Uni work has been replaced with Amazon and Ebay searches for anime characters (Sally), Disney princesses (Wilma) and pop stars (me). Originally, I was just going to be a cat. Wear a black dress, buy some ears and paint on whiskers. Simple enough right? But then, with my flatties, as I like to call them, coming up with exciting costume ideas and the dawning realization that I was 1/6 of a host I decided to be something a bit more exciting.
I won't bore you with the details of the various costume ideas I went through. All I will say is that, as a woman, trying to find a Halloween costume that isn't short, tight or otherwise showing everyone your reproductive parts is a very difficult task. See below:
Anyway, call me old-fashioned but I liked the days when there wasn't so much pressure on girls to look sexy and glamorous rather than actually scary. All women's costumes seem to come with the word 'sexy' or 'tease' or 'babe' in the title. Now, don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong with wanting to look sexy on Halloween. But it's rare to find a 'sexy' costume for a man. It feels like women are oversexualized when it comes to Halloween. But I suppose that could be said about a lot of things in society. I mean any Rihanna or Miley Cyrus video tends to paint women as very sexual beings and parents still allow their children to watch and listen to them. But I digress. I guess the point of all this is that as a young girl you can dress up as a witch, vampire or fairy without it having to be 'hot'. But as soon as young girls hit their teens there seems to be a sudden need for them to dress in as little clothes as possible. And with children being exposed to these sexualized images of women is it only a matter of time before little girls are asking their parents to buy them sexy nurse outfits? Or worse that companies actually start making them for little girls?
Anyway, in the end I decided to go as Lady Gaga. Which with some of the outfits she's worn you're probably now thinking I'm a hypocrite with this whole post. But It's nothing too shocking. And certainly with me wearing it, it will be anything but sexy.
Jeni
Sunday 29 September 2013
An Introduction
So after months of talking (and thinking about it) I've finally taken the plunge. I'm writing a blog. Now my every word and thought can be judged. This is very new territory. Apart from Facebook my online social footprint has never made much leeway. But now at the ripe old age of 20, I've decided to share my thoughts on the world. I can't promise what this blog will be like exactly. But I do know it will be a confusing mass of rants, celebrity gossip and general life lessons. Because what else would people want to read on the internet? Wish me luck!
Jeni
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