So the other day my flatties (refer to my last post if you don't know what I mean) and I were discussing school memories. We got onto talking about P.E, specifically swimming. Now, I only had to go swimming when I was in primary school and that was a good 10 years ago. But the horrible memories have stayed with me as if it was yesterday. On our first time there our class had to be divided into 3 groups. Squares, circles and triangles. Squares were the strongest swimmers, circles were the average swimmers and triangles were pretty awful. Guess which one I got put in?
Now, I haven't been swimming in a few years but I know I should have been placed higher than a triangle. The reason being, the group placements were based on swim races. So basically the fastest person got put into the top group and the slowest got put in the bottom one. Just because I came last in a stupid race I was forever a stupid triangle. By the way, in case you can't tell I'm still bitter about this. Anyway, after this conversation it made me realize that so much of life is a competition. I know I made a leap there.
P.E.in school was always supposed to be fun. But for people like me who aren't naturally athletic and sporty (ok, lazy) it was torture. EVERYTHING in our gym classes were competitive. Who can run the fastest? Who can do the most sit-ups in circuit training? Who can survive until the end in dodge ball. Note: I always pretended I'd been put out so I could sit out. Even social dancing was horrific. The fear of being picked last by a boy and in other words being told you were unattractive, unappealing and might as well start collecting mouse toys for when you become a lonely cat lady. I only got picked second last-YAY!
And it doesn't stop in school. University is a constant competition. Whose work is best? Who gets top marks? Who is the hot girl/guy of the class? Everything is aimed at us having to be scrutinized, evaluated and compared against others. I'm still at the uni stage but I know it continues. Workplace competition would be significantly worse I can imagine. First, the fighting for the job, then trying to show you're worthy of the position, then trying to work out who wants to be your friend and who is after your job and trying to make you look bad to oust you from the business.
With the people you're closest to? That can be even more horrific in terms of competition. Everyone's going to have a friend who's more popular, more successful, better looking, smarter, funnier and just seems to have their life more together. There's the fine line between wanting your friends to be happy but not happier than you. Don't deny it, we all know it's true. As much as you love the fact that your friend was so happy in her relationship and completely loved up, you can't deny the the smile of satisfaction that spreads across your face when you find out they're single again. Now, they have more time for you and know what it's like when something fails. Ok, maybe that's a little harsh but you know what I mean. If a friend gets a great new job you're happy for them. But only if you've just met a tall, dark, handsome millionaire who wants to take you to his Caribbean Island on a private jet and make you financially secure for the rest of your life. Or something like that.
Even relationships can be like this. Who is considered to be punching above their weight? Who is the one bringing home the most money? Who gets the most attention when enjoying separate nights out with friends? EVERYTHING is a competition. And it kind of sucks. Sometimes you just want to curl up in bed with a massive stockpile of chocolate and admit that you just don't care anymore. But instead you doll yourself up, put a smile on your face and write up a big Facebook status about something great in your life. It may not compare to Shannon travelling the world, Kelly getting engaged or Chloe getting a promotion at work but if it makes you happy, then shouldn't that be enough?
See this lady for more: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfW8deSlsiA
So, now you can understand why I called this blog post what I did. Life is an ongoing competition. And whether you win or lose at some of those challenges all you can do is laugh. Or eat chocolate. Chocolate is good too.
Jeni
Friday 25 October 2013
Thursday 3 October 2013
Is Halloween sexist?
The title of this entry may seem ridiculous. Halloween is just a time of year when people get dressed up and eat as many sugary treats (or drink alcohol if you're older) as possible. How can it be sexist? Well before you roll your eyes, cluck your tongues and accuse me of being a bra-burning feminist just hang on.
Jeni
As a university student my flatmates and I have decided to throw a Halloween party. Probably nothing too crazy. We'll decorate the flat, have a few friends round and maybe play 'Just Dance' (one of my flatmates is obsessed with it). Trying to decide what to wear has become a monumental chore in our household. We've all been stressed talking to each other about what we will go as. Sleep has been lost over the issue. Uni work has been replaced with Amazon and Ebay searches for anime characters (Sally), Disney princesses (Wilma) and pop stars (me). Originally, I was just going to be a cat. Wear a black dress, buy some ears and paint on whiskers. Simple enough right? But then, with my flatties, as I like to call them, coming up with exciting costume ideas and the dawning realization that I was 1/6 of a host I decided to be something a bit more exciting.
I won't bore you with the details of the various costume ideas I went through. All I will say is that, as a woman, trying to find a Halloween costume that isn't short, tight or otherwise showing everyone your reproductive parts is a very difficult task. See below:
Anyway, call me old-fashioned but I liked the days when there wasn't so much pressure on girls to look sexy and glamorous rather than actually scary. All women's costumes seem to come with the word 'sexy' or 'tease' or 'babe' in the title. Now, don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong with wanting to look sexy on Halloween. But it's rare to find a 'sexy' costume for a man. It feels like women are oversexualized when it comes to Halloween. But I suppose that could be said about a lot of things in society. I mean any Rihanna or Miley Cyrus video tends to paint women as very sexual beings and parents still allow their children to watch and listen to them. But I digress. I guess the point of all this is that as a young girl you can dress up as a witch, vampire or fairy without it having to be 'hot'. But as soon as young girls hit their teens there seems to be a sudden need for them to dress in as little clothes as possible. And with children being exposed to these sexualized images of women is it only a matter of time before little girls are asking their parents to buy them sexy nurse outfits? Or worse that companies actually start making them for little girls?
Anyway, in the end I decided to go as Lady Gaga. Which with some of the outfits she's worn you're probably now thinking I'm a hypocrite with this whole post. But It's nothing too shocking. And certainly with me wearing it, it will be anything but sexy.
Jeni
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